Permission to Sit

Sometimes you just gotta sit.

From March of 2011 to February 2012, I’ve attended four major yoga workshops: “Functional Anatomy for Yoga Teachers” with Ellen Heed, “Authentic Teaching” with Sue Jones and Alex Amorosi, I received my Reiki I certification in November, and just completed the five week “Advanced Teaching Concepts” with Jacqui Bonwell. It has been a year of intensive learning and self-reflection.  I have dug deep and discovered a lot. I have spent more time thinking about yoga and about teaching than I ever thought possible.

A few months ago I read this great book by David Richo and this one sentence has stuck to me like a burr:

“Practice does not mean forcing yourself to improve, but rather trusting your potential to open”

My brain and heart are so full from all that I’ve learned in the past year and now is the time to put it all into practice: to live it, be it, tweak it, and trust the process of my own practice to begin to integrate what I’ve absorbed.

This will be a first for me since I’m not much one to just metaphorically sit. I like answers, action, DOING something. I love learning. If I could be a university student for life (on someone else’s dime!) I totally would. Taking classes, being exposed to new ideas, and the process of learning really gets me going. In my enjoyment of learning, I get so caught up in the process that I have never allowed myself to be with what I’ve learned. I’ve spent years forcing myself to improve through classes, but never trusted the wisdom that comes from sitting with what I’ve learned.

Starting today, I am giving myself full permission to SIT.

I am going to sit the eff down with all I’ve learned about teaching, yoga, anatomy, healing, energetics, and myself. I will trust myself to open, I will let myself be, and I will let time and experience be the integrator. I will mull, marinate, practice, and feel. I will move with what I’ve learned, practicing it on my mat and in my teaching. This is going to be a whopping big challenge … one that I’m really looking forward to!

As any yoga teacher knows, the great irony of teaching is finding the time to actually practice.  Getting to a studio is not always possible and, until recently, I wasn’t much of a home practice gal. However, I’m feeling the itch and urge to GET ON MY MAT. It’s pretty obvious that my brain’s got a lot to work out and getting feet down (or bum down) on a sticky mat is the best place for that to happen.

This past year has been a diverse, rich, and utterly delicious multi-course feast. Now it’s time to push away from the table and digest it all.

A Month in Books: January 2012

Seriously rough reading mojo this month. I put two books down, unfinished and the ones I finished, with a few exceptions, were pretty blah. However, The Night Circus saved me from giving up completely. It’s not a perfect book, but the blend of magic realism, history and romance was exactly what I needed to start climbing up out of my slump.

As always, links take you to my full review on Goodreads.com

A Year in Books: 2011

This yearly wrap up isn’t late! I’m working on a lunar calendar, so it’s right on time.

This was a good year for reading. My new commute to work has given me an extra 45 minutes of time to read, though the new smartphone does sometimes pose a distraction. I met my reading challenge for 2011 of 80 books and have set a new one of 86. In 2012 I’d like to branch out a bit more, read more non-fiction, some travel writing, and discover at least one new author with a deep backlist I can dive into.

So with goals reviewed and new goals set, here are the numbers for 2011. (Full spreadsheet here if you’re interested in that kind of stuff.)

The Toaster

I think everyone has that one kitchen appliance that they can’t live without: mixer, blender, microwave … For me it’s a toaster. No matter where I’ve lived, I HAVE to have a toaster. Before any other appliance, a toaster was the most necessary item in my kitchen. (I’m talking traditional toaster, not a toaster oven. I hate those and have an irrational fear that even letting one near my house will cause  spontaneous combustion. Irrational, I know.)

About a month ago, our little $9.00 toaster from Target died.

In abject panic, my immediate thought was to run out and buy a new one.  What was I going to do without my toaster???  Luckily, not having a car makes it tough to dash out and buy things. So I paused … and I remembered that I has just discovered the over broiler.  Unlike previous ovens, this one’s a bottom drawer that just so happens to be the perfect size and height for making toast!

Good-bye, toaster!  Hello, broiler!

One less gadget to store (in a kitchen with 2.5′ of counter space that’s awesome!) and the broiler is actually faster than the old toaster.  I’m still learning how to gauge time so I don’t end up with burned toast, but I think I’m in love.

Funny how, with a breath and some ingenuity, what seems like a problem turns into a wonderful new experience!

Rockstar Yoga

Backstory: wheel (the yoga pose) and I are nemeses. There’s a chasm of mistrust and pain between us. I feel that way about most backbends. (I’m a committed supported bridge girl.) Except flip dog. LOVE it. Some how, flipping my dog lets me feel the sense of lightness and flight that I think I should get from backbends.

So you can imagine my joy when I was introduced to “rock star” earlier this week (Adena’s 4:00pm class at yogapower in Waltham, MA). We came into the pose from side plank and I could feel my chest fall open, my shoulder blades move down and in … and I was grinning like a fool the entire time. Love at first pose.  So of course, I have to share my love and all my classes this week have incorporated rock star as a mid-way point for deeper backbends. Love rock star and I’m starting to reconsider my perspective on backbends in general.

Rockstar Yoga
75 minutes
(Much gratitude to Adena for inspiring this sequence!)

supported fish
roll to table top
cat/cow
opposite arm/leg extension, with optional bind
all-fours core (press toenails to mat, lift knees one inch – YIKES!)
downward facing dog
high plank
down dog
plank with knees down
lower to belly
cobra
all fours
down dog
three-legged dog
runner’s lunge
pyramid
(breathe lunge/pyramid three times, then repeat other side)
walk to front of mat
tadasana
om om om
vinyasa to down dog

dolphin

down dog
three-legged dog with hip opener
core plank
three legged dog
runners lunge
crescent lunge
tall twist
reverse twist
windmill down to plank
side plank
ROCKSTAR
vinyasa to down dog

three-legged dog
core plank
three-legged dog
warrior II
reverse warrior
half moon with optional bind
warrior II
reverse warrior
reverse triangle
triangle
prasaritta A/B
revolved triangle
utkatasana twist
dancer

half pigeon

(take mats to the wall and roll egde of mat in 3-4 times that’s closest to wall to provide knee padding)
quad stretch against the wall
lunge out from wall

(lengthen mat back out)

bridge/wheel at wall
supta baddha konasana
happy baby
inversion at wall
spinal twist
savasana, optional legs up the wall

Note: “Rockstar” and variations are also called “Wild Thing”.  Two names you cannot go wrong with in a yoga class!

A Month in Books: December 2011

December was a pretty standard mix of romance and mystery books. I finished the year strong with 84 books “read” (I put it in quotes because there were a handful of Did Not Finish) and have set my 2012 goal for 86 books.

My second annual Year in Books is coming up soon.  I always like seeing the breakdown of what I read, genres, etc… It’s an interesting retrospective and a fun way to remember the very good and the very worst books I came across in 2011.

To finish out the year, here are the books I read in December.  Links take you to full reviews on Goodreads.com.

2012: A Year of Flight

2011 was an incredible year. I learned so much, explored new places and ideas, and put down some new roots. I met a few of my goals, though not all, as life likes to throw those funny curve balls.

I explored more styles of yoga and attend some wonderful classes and workshops.  I am in better control of my finances with an emergency fund, a travel fund and a plan to pay off student debt.  Career goals were tougher, but I remain positive in the face of transition. As for fitness/wellness, I finished my first 5K, though not in under 30  minutes, and learned that I can run!

When thinking of my goals and resolutions for 2012,  I realized my yoga goals make a pretty awesome intention for the entire year. They all have one thing in common: FLIGHT.  In 2012 I want to figure out crow (bakasana) and headstand (sirsasana). Both poses require learning to lift off the ground and find flight and balance in space.  Both poses require a solid foundation and a trust that even if the foundation shifts, you can take a breath and try again. Sounds like a perfect theme for 2012 to me!

Thus, 2012 is THE YEAR OF FLIGHT.

YOGA
- Crow Pose: figure it out, get into it, and hold it for 3-5 breaths
- Sirsasana: figure it out, get into it, wall support is totally ok
- Continue to invest in my practice and my teaching by attending workshops and classes
- Commit to a home practice and complete a 30 day “home practice” challenge to set the habit

FINANCIAL
- Pay off 1/3 of my student debt by 12/31/2011
- Continue to build the travel fund (possible goal: Thailand in 20??)
- Become a more savvy budgeter (this includes actually creating a budget and having a “come to Jesus” with shopping)

CAREER
- Stay employed
- Own my new responsibilities and role in the library. This is a year for me to shine and become a resource and local expert for my colleagues

FITNESS/WELLNESS
- Continue to eat healthy, happily and safely (I really like that goal.)
- Work with a personal trainer to build a habit out of weight training and cardio

PERSONAL
- read more poetry and non-fiction
- be kinder to myself (positive self-talk and belief)
- learn to appreciate black coffee
- wear mascara 2 or less days a week

What are your goals and resolutions for 2012?